


Trans + Adopted

by ShanooonThePhangirl



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-08
Packaged: 2018-07-21 14:12:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7390393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShanooonThePhangirl/pseuds/ShanooonThePhangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My name is alex. I lived with my parents until the age of 13. On my 13th birthday I came out as transgender to my family. they didn't want me anymore. I didnt know what to do..</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

My name is Alex. I am 13 years old. The Adoption home I live in is horrible. I hate it here and I cant wait to leave. Everyone here hates me because I'm a lesbian. And Im transgender. I was born a male but something never felt right. I never felt okay to be myself. 

 

my 13th birthday -   
I woke up with a headache. I had been crying most the night from thinking too much. I took a deep breath as I pulled out the dress and leggings I had bought for myself out my wardrobe. I felt amazing as I pulled the comforting silk over my face. I could do this. This is who I want to be. After I was dressed I crouched down infront of the mirror, applying makeup to my face. When I felt comfortable with myself I slowly walked downstairs. I stood infront of the living room door and took a deep breath. Here goes nothing.  
The second I opened the door everyone in the room fell silent.   
"Is this some fucking joke, Alex." my dad said, walking over to me,  
"n- no" I muttered.  
"Who do you think you are. Your a male don't you know?"   
"I-I know dad" I whispered   
"this is who I want to be" I whispered.  
"Bullshit!" my dad shouted, harshly smacking me. I gasped loudly and started running. I ran into my room and locked the door. I heard my dads heavy footsteps on the stairs and then an attempt to open my door.  
"Son... Alex! open this door right now"   
I didnt dare object him. I opened the door instantly. He ran into the room and grabbed me.   
"Fucking disgusting! Get out of this house now!"  
"but.. where will I go?"   
"find out yourself" he said, spitting on my face.   
He left the room and slammed the door behind him. I pulled down the suitcase from the top of my wardrobe and packed up everything I owned. I didnt own that much stuff. My parents cared about my little sister more than me. I threw the case down the stairs and walked after it. I walked into the living room where my mum,Dad and little sister were sat. they all turned to face me.  
"I'm leaving. fuck you all" I shouted, mostly from pure anger. I slammed the doors behind me and walked with my suitcase. I walked through the old park, down through the forest and to the high bridge. I stood there for a while.   
I could end it all right now.  
everything would be gone.   
I shuffled closer to the edge. I slowly stood up, ready to jump.   
"NO! DON'T DO IT" I heard someone shout. they scared me, making me lose my balance. I felt a tight grip around my waist. I leant back against them, finally letting my tears fall freely. when we were back on the ground I turned around to see who it was. A tall man, with amazing blue eyes and black hair cut into a fringe.  
"it's okay. it will get better. I promise" the person said. they hugged me tightly. I'd never met someone who cared about me so much. This made me cry harder.  
"Thanks s-so much" i replied  
"Are you okay? do you have a home? whats your name?"He asked.  
"My names alex. I-im a transgender. I was born a boy... but"  
"I understand. My names Phil. Phil Lester"   
I nodded. "I have nowhere to stay" I muttered. I felt quite cold and eventually started to shiver. Phil pulled off his coat and wrapped it around me.   
"Come with me. to my appartment" he said. I looked up to him. I trusted him alot. he didn't seem like some crazy pedophile or something. I nodded to him again. He kept an arm around my back in a friendly way and pulled my suitcase for me. We were only walking for a few minutes when he took me into a large building. we took the lift up to phils appartment and I followed him inside. There were 3 other men on a nearby sofa. I looked at them, not knowing what to say. Phil introduced me to his friends.   
Chris and Pj, his best friends. they were dating each other and cuddled together on the sofa. they were both really nice and said hi to me.   
"And here's my boyfriend Dan" Phil said, climbing onto the sofa next to Dan. Dan was also as nice as phil, just slightly more awkward. A perfect match to me. Phil let me sit next to him. I hardly knew these people but I felt so safe with them. I fell asleep after speaking with everyone for a while. When I woke up Chris and PJ were leaving. I said bye to them and then looked to phil.   
"are you okay with us cuddling or kissing or something?" dan asked me, blushing slightly.   
"No I dont mind at all. Im a lesbian myself. I think its cute " I said, watching the tv with them. it was a baking show. Dan didnt take it seriously at all.  
"Chris Brown that egg!"he shouted frequently.   
This was the most id ever laughed before. the doorbell randomly went and Phil ran to get it.   
"are you okay... Phil told me about ... the bridge" dan asked. I shrugged and looked him in the eye.  
"I'm sorry. dont be upset... ooo pizza!" dan said. he was excited over the pizza. Phil Handed me a pizza. I had an issue with eating much. I ate as much as I could. Phil touched my shoulder gently.   
"Alex, are you okay? You havent eaten much"  
I shrugged again, blinking to try to not cry. Phil hugged me again.  
"I'm so sorry alex" he said.   
"it's okay. Can I go to bed now? I'm really tired." I whispered.   
Dan and phil glanced at the clock. it was almost 4am already. Dan and phil both took me to the guest room. phil helped me into my bed whilst dan took my suitcase. A few minutes later I heard faint noises coming from their room. It sounded obvious what was going on in there. I started laughing at them. They were loud in bed. I fell alseep shortly after


	2. Until we meet again

I woke up the next day feeling the most refreshed I had in ages. I walked through to the living room, Phil was there but Dan wasn't.  
"Wheres Dan?"  
"I think hes still sleeping. he was tired after last night." Phil said, laughing slightly. I giggled a bit.  
"what are we doing today?" I asked.  
"Well, We have some shopping to do, and then we have to say goodbye and You have to go to the adoption home for a while"  
"I don't want to go!"  
"me and Dan don't want you to either. we want to adopt you permanantly" Phil said. he had tears in his eyes.  
"Really?" I asked.  
"Of course we do. It's like you're our daughter"  
"Thank you!" I said, Hugging him tightly  
"hey I want to join in too!" said Dan, sleepily running towards us and jumping next to us  
I felt so loved. So wanted. So happy when they hugged me .

when we were all dressed they took me into town. Dan and phil told me to wait outside whilst they went into the apple store. About 10 minutes later they walked out and handed me a small bag with a box inside. I opened the box. There was a brand new Iphone 6s Plus.  
"f-for me?" I looked up. I wasn't expecting it.  
they both nodded.  
"oh my god! thanks so much guys"  
"you're welcome. text us or ring us if you ever need us for anything. our numbers are already in the phone for you." said Dan. I nodded and put the phone inside my pocket. next we went to a body store and dan and phil Bought me bright purple hair dye. I was so thankful. they were so nice to me.

After we got back and the dye was in my hair, we were waiting until I could wash it off. Phil accidentally touched my neck.  
"NO!" I accidentally shouted, ducking down.  
"aww you're just like Dan" Phil said.  
"huh?" Dan said, looking up from his phone screen for once. Phil walked up to Dan and placed his hand on Dan's neck. Dan pushed phil so hard that he staggered and slipped in water on the floor. I covered my eyes. after a few seconds I hadn't heard anything so I moved my hands. Dan was clinging onto phils arm whilst phil was inches away from hitting his head on the sink. I helped phil onto his feet with Dans help.  
"are you okay phil?"  
"I'm not okay. I'm not okay." Phil sang. I laughed at him. Dan told me to lean over the bath whilst he washed the dye from my hair. after it was rinsed Phil wrapped a towel around my hair. he dried my hair for me and then held a mirror infront of me. I gasped when I saw it. It looked amazing.  
"Thanks so much! I love it!" I said, hugging Both Dan and phil together.  
"It's okay. The social worker wants you to be at the home by 7pm tonight. we need to pack your stuff up." said Phil.  
"I don't want to leave!" I said, trying to prevent myself from crying.  
"We don't want you to leave either" said Dan, pulling me close to him and putting his hand on the back of my head. I leant against him for a few seconds before stepping back. I couldn't help from crying. Phil was facing the opposite wall, staring at the wall. Dan turned him round by the shoulders. Phil was also crying. Phil hugged me for a second, before lifting me right up off the ground.  
"you're so light" Phil said, holding onto me. I was quite small for my age and thin.  
"Just promise me something" Phil said, staring into my eyes. I looked back at him  
"Promise me your going to be okay. Please don't do anything stupid." He said. I nodded to him as he put me down on the bed in the spare room. We all packed up everything I owned into my case. It was 5:30pm when we were done. we had to set off to the adoption home in a few minutes.  
"Thank you so much for stopping me from jumping phil. Thanks for letting me stay here. I've had so much fun here. Thanks for saving me guys" I said to them on our way out.  
"You're welcome. I really want to be a parent now" Said Phil. Dan smiled at phils comment. 

The cab pulled up outside a Large, colourful building. Phil climbed out of the cab, followed by Dan and my Case. I slowly climbed out. I couldn't stop shaking with fear.  
"I don't want to leave. don't leave me here" I said. Phil took my hand and took me to the door.

"No. Please. Dan. Phil. Please don't" I said, Holding onto both their hands tightly. An oldish looking woman came to the door.  
"aha. I'm guessing you're alex. Please come in sweetheart" she said.  
I stepped backwards and shook my head. Phil pulled me into the building with him. the woman led us up to the room I would be staying in. It was quite big and I didn't have to share the room. Phil put me down on the bed in the corner of the room. Dan put the case opposite the bed and sat with me and Phil. We had stayed speaking for a while, until the woman came back.   
"I'm sorry but I'm afraid You'll have to leave in five minutes" She said. I was crying loudly already.   
"I don't want you to leave" I said to them both. Phil leaned down and kissed my forehead. Dan did the same.   
"We will be back for you. I promise. You can come live with us" Dan said, smiling to me.   
"really? thanks so much" I said. I smiled to them and watched them being escorted out by the woman. Phil stopped before he reached the gate. He hugged me the same way he had when he saved me.   
"Please stay strong alex. text or ring us whenever, okay?. Bye. we love you. see you soon" He said as their taxi pulled up. They waved to me until I couldn't see them anymore. I ignored everybody in the building and went straight to my room. I sat on my bed and stared at the blank walls.   
"Until we meet again" I whispered into the empty room.


	3. Don't give up the fight.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Phil haven't returned. Alex didn't want to ring them. If they never came, they didn't want her anymore, right?

Dan and Phil never returned. I waited Day after day, week after week. It had been over two months now. Everybody at this home hated me. I endlessly scrolled through tumblr. I saw a link that was reposted alot.  
"Internet stars Dan Howell and Phil Lester announce 'soon to be new addition' to their family"  
That was strange. Two people under the names Dan and Phil. Had dan and phil ever told me their surnames? were they internet stars? how?  
the thoughts ran through my head. I opened a google page and typed into the search bar 'Dan and Phil'. Instantly hundreds of images came up. All of Dan and Phil. The couple who were adopting me. I clicked a link to a youtube page.  
NEW -"DanIsNotOnFire & AmazingPhil - Expanding our family!  
I clicked the video. It WAS them. they were sat on the familliar sofa in the living room, but they weren't anywhere as near as close together as when I had been there. They acted like friends instead of a couple. The video made me smile alot. Then they started speaking about me. they didn't reveal my name or gender or anything. They said that I was kind and other sweet things. Phil mentioned the day about the bridge, and simply saving me, but not too much detail.  
"On a final note, something you crazy shippers will love... Phan is confirmed" Said Dan, blushing and smiling up to phil. They both hugged each other for a few seconds, and then the camera went off and the video ended. I hadn't realised until now that I was crying from happiness. I was happy for a few seconds until The thoughts came back.  
They don't really want you.  
its all for the press.  
It's just to make them look like they care.  
They don't really care about you  
Nobody wants you.  
Kill yourself already. 

Reading through the comments on the video made them worse. thousands of people said they hated me already. They said I wanted attention. They said I'd be better off dead.  
I continued scrolling through the internet, finding more and more about Dan and Phil, including their twitter names. 

@danisnotonfire : I can't wait for Them to come home. Show them some respect. I love the phandom but some of you need to grow up. I'm sorry.  
@danisnotonfire : Why tell someone to kill themselves? Its plain fucking rude.  
Dan had loads of tweets. I knew some had to be about the recent video and me.  
I got bored and Decided to go to the park. I stopped on the way at the bridge, staring over the edge. I wanted to take a picture of the nearby waterfall. I sat on the edge and leant over and waited for my camera to focus. Just as the photo was taken somebody pushed me. I heard familliar sniggers. someone from the home. My phone fell from my hand into the river as I tried to keep a grip on the wall. I heard shouts from the nearby park. I saw people running over to me as I tried to keep hold of the thick rocks.  
"Alex? Is that you?" I heard someone shout.  
"Yes... Please! Help me!" I shouted.  
Within seconds I was safe on the ground. I turned around to see Phils familliar face.  
"Phil! It's really you!" I said to him, hugging him.  
"We saw someone talking to you and we thought you were friends until We saw you and your phone drop" He said. Dan walked up behind him a minute later. His jeans were wet up to the knees. He passed me my phone and hugged me.  
"You look really tired. are you okay?" Phil asked me.  
"mhmm" I replied. I did feel very tired now. Surprisingly Phil lifted me up as if I was a young child.  
"We were about to collect you from the care home. Did you not get the texts?" He said. I shook my head and closed my eyes whilst I leant over phils shoulder.

Dan rang a cab to come for us. I sat between Dan and Phil. I must of been really tired because the next thing I knew I woke up leant against Dans shoulder.  
"I'm so sorry dan! I didn't mean to crush you!" I said, trying to quickly sit up but feeling dizzy.   
"No, you didn't crush me at all. it was pretty cute to be honest. it's fine Alex, you're tired"He said.  
"o-okay. Wheres phil?"  
"Hes getting your stuff for you from the home, Then we're going home"  
I nodded sleepily. I tried to go back to sleep whilst sitting up straight. My neck started to hurt and felt uncomfortable. Dan noticed me moving alot and wrapped his arm around me, pulling me closer and letting me rest my head on his shoulder. A second later the car boot slammed and Phil climbed in next to us. I liked being sat between them, both of them with their arm around me. I felt safe. I felt protected. 

For the first time in my life, I felt loved


End file.
